"You're only young once................."

"But you can be immature forever." Motto of the Lawn Ranger Precision
Lawnmower Drill Team

Chapter 1
I made it through Customs with a minimal amount of fuss, aside from pissing
the guy off when I kept insisting I was coming from Ottawa, and going to
Ottawa. I finally told him to check the plastic thing around the license
plate which said "Skydive Chicago - Ottawa Illinois". He let me in.

I left Montreal at 6:20, and after a 14 hour drive, I made it to the parking
lot at Skydive Chicago in time to make the last load. That is, I could have
made the last load if I hadn't been sidetracked by "Larry and Joanne's World
Famous Drive Through Beer Window". Kelly spotted me when I was pulling up
and handed me an already opened ice-cold beer through the truck window by
the time I had come to a complete stop. Timing is everything

And the peasants rejoiced.

I've received a couple of emails from people asking if I was OK because I
haven't sent out any emails since my departure, including one from John
Mehary offering bail money if necessary - he feels a certain responsibility
as he is the one who got me into skydiving. But the simple explanation is
that it has just been a typical boogie, with typical boogie nonsense and
stupidity. Don't get me wrong, I'm having a lot of fun, but nothing that I
haven't told you all about before. The Annual Flying Hellfish Toga Party
lived up to it's usual reputation for drunken excess rivaling the most
debauched days of the Roman Empire, at least that's what the pictures I took
seemed to show, I don't actually remember much of it myself. Bob and Sky
aren't here and Phil is staying with Kelly, so I was able to swoop a bunk in
The Swamp and save myself having to pitch a tent. We've been on the first
load 3 mornings in a row, there are 5 Twin Otters flying non-stop, the
weather has been perfect, the people friendly, and the booze cheap.

The fireworks display was last night. This year they started it off with
skydivers in wing suits tracking across the sky dragging fireworks behind
them, and then they set off a series of explosions and fireballs as an Otter
strafed the field. Last year they actually attached the fireworks to the
Otter but a whole bunch of people called the fire department and the FAA to
report a plane on fire, so they decided to do something else this year.

The jumping has been at a leisurely pace, a total of 19 over 3 days. I
promised the team I wouldn't tire myself out, and would arrive in Burnaby
"hungry to jump", and I also promised Nathalie I wouldn't get all beat to
heck, which usually happens to me at this type of event. The skydiving has
been of the mindless "we've got 10 minutes to plan and dirt dive a 7-way, so
there's no rush" type of jump, no pressure, just laughs when it funnels,
exactly what I needed after an entire spring and summer of hard-core
training and tunnel.

I'll be leaving bright and early tomorrow for Burnaby, Nationals, and some
very very serious skydiving.
End of Chapter 1