Yesterday I made a mistake that cost everybody on the camp the chance to have their beer bought by Doug Forth. I still feel he set me up for that by leaving me in the same spot on the skydive, but moving me to a different airplane for the ride up. This morning, at 8 o'clock, I extracted my revenge with a style that mere mortals can only dream of duplicating.
Every day Doug would release us with the words: "8 o'clock tomorrow, in jumpsuits on the creeper pad, rain or shine, no excuses, no exceptions."
We all gathered this morning in the rain as instructed, on time at 8, everyone dutifully wearing their jumpsuits. Or I should say, almost everyone. I heard Cindy Jardine, standing behind me say "It's not a good sign when Dan BC isn't wearing his suit." Instantly I was wide awake, and staring at Doug standing with the rest of the organizers, also not wearing a suit.
YES! Here is my chance for revenge being served up on a golden platter in front of the entire camp!
Stepping into the middle of the circle I turned to face the organizers and repeated Doug's words in as loud a voice as I could muster with my laryngitis. "8 AM, in jump suits on the creeper pad, rain or shine, no
excuses, no exceptions!"
There was total silence as the entire group turned to see where I was looking, and realized that the only organizer who was wearing a jumpsuit was Monique Andrie. Raising my arm to point at a startled Doug Forth I shouted "Beer!" And the cheering began. Pointing at Dan BC, one of the pioneers of formation skydiving, a hero and legend to everyone in the sport, I shouted "Beer!" And the cheering, laughter and applause grew. Pointing at Kate Cooper-Jensen, one of the top skydivers on the planet, organizer for more women's and world records than I can count and shouted "Beer!" The crowd went wild. I turned to Tony Domenico, owner of Square 1, and a driving force behind Perris Performance Plus, who was trying unsuccessfully to hide behind a row of skydivers, pointed and yelled "Beer!" I heard Brains voice say "Check Lyall!" The crowd parted so I could see Lyall Waddell, owner of Eden North and a major figure in Canadian Skydiving, sans suit. "Beer!"
Dan Bc immediately produced a 20 dollar bill and asked "Who's the beer cop?"
"I'll take that" I shouted.
"That's for me and Kate," he said.
Tony produced a twenty-dollar bill and said, "that's for me and Kate."
Yes! I'm already up ten bucks.
I got ten bucks from Doug, and when Lyall went to pay me, he produced a five-dollar bill and started pawing through a mitt full of bills looking for another one. I pointed at one of the twenties and said, here, just give me
one of those, and I'll give you ten dollars back. He gave me the twenty, I gave him back the five-dollar bill he gave me and another five-dollar bill and walked away with him doing the math in his head as he came to the
realization that I'd hosed him for five dollars. I also got five dollars each from two other unfortunate skydivers who'd been foolish enough to forget their suits. That gave me a total of seventy-five dollars.
I strode to the middle of crowd and holding my fists above my head demanded "Have I redeemed myself??" And the crowd started to chant "Larry! Larry! Larry!"
I don't care if I don't skydive today, I don't care if I don't skydive again before I leave here. It's been a good day.
Life does not suck.
Doug adjourned us to the Bomb Shelter for a group photo and while we were standing around, Dan BC walked over, stuck out his hand, and said "Congratulations, Larry. My opinion of you went from here", holding his hand out about the level of his head, "to here", he said, reaching up as high as he could. "You'll be
doing front float for the rest of your life, and your children's children will be doing front float for the rest of theirs, but the rules are the rules and we're all working under them and good for you for calling us on them."
"Will there be a note in my file?" I asked.
"Oh yeah," he replied, "you won't be forgotten."
As long as I get to be front float on the world record in Dubai in 2 years I won't mind one bit.
As soon as the group photo was taken, we were released until 10:30, and we made a beeline for Winco and the cheapest beer we could find. We returned to the drop zone on time, to the creeper pad, jumpsuits on, accompanied by a stack of beer. I was half tempted to show up wearing my rig and helmet, visor down, ready to get on a plane. Everybody showed up with jumpsuits, including Doug Forth, who was carrying every jumpsuit he could find.
It's now 11 o'clock and we have been released until noon.
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