Crazy Larry's Excellent Adventures

A few years ago when I was shopping around for a new bike I saw a picture of an FZ1 with Monument Valley in the background, and I thought that if I was ever on a bike and in the neighborhood, I would try and get a similar pic. As I was preparing to leave Eloy on Wednesday morning I noticed the circle I had drawn around Monument Valley months ago on my Arizona map, and that was all it took to completely change my plan for the day. Instead of visiting Tombstone and then heading for San Antonio, I pulled the bike off the trailer, loaded the saddle bags with all the warm clothing they would hold, and headed north into the mountains. The mountains became forest, then high plains, then desert again, and 400 miles later, just after sunset, I pulled into Kayenta, just outside Monument Valley. The hotel was filled with tourists toting bags of camera equipment raving about the spectacular photographs they had just taken of the sunset in the valley. I may have missed the sunset, but there was no way I'd miss sunrise.

It was just above freezing in the predawn darkness as I drove into the valley. I took hundreds of shots as the sun rose lighting up the landscape in ever changing colors. And I had the place all to myself. All those tourists with all that equipment were nowhere to be seen. I even took a side trip down a dirt, sand, and gravel road into The Valley Of The Gods. I'd have spent hours driving around in there if I wasn't worried about running out of gas or getting trapped on the way back to Eloy by the winter storm that was forecast for Friday. Most importantly, I found the perfect spot, and got exactly the pic I wanted. With the morning light putting a golden glow on everything you can't even tell how filthy the bike is after driving that dirt road.

I took a different route home, picking winding mountain roads that brought me back through Flagstaff and down highway 60 through Globe, the area I had spent so much time tearing around in when I had stayed in Eloy 2 months previously. I was cruising along in late afternoon, paying no attention to how fast I was going as I enjoyed the gorgeous day, when I passed a State Trooper tucked into a turnout. I backed off on the throttle as soon as I noticed him but it was already too late, he hit his roof lights and started to pull out onto the highway. I hit nailed the brakes hard, managing to stop before I even reached the far end of the turnout. I had gotten off the bike and started digging in my wallet for "drivers licence, registration, proof of insurance" when I heard a voice say "Well, you're making progress. This time you were only going seventy-two miles an hour! But the speed limit on this highway is also fifty-five!" I whipped my head up to see the smiling face of the same Cop who had pulled me over the last time I came down this road!

I didn't know what else to do, so I started laughing, he started laughing, and the two of us stood there at the side of the highway laughing so hard I almost started to cry. The traffic going past slowed to a crawl as everybody gawked at the spectacle of 2 grown men at the side of the road laughing so hard they could barely stand up.

He finally managed to ask "I thought you said you were going to California?" I explained about California, and heading to Florida to meet Diane, and getting sidetracked by Monument Valley. "You drove to Monument Valley and back in two days? And how fast were you going? That's 400 miles one way!" I allowed as how I may have been going kinda quick but pointed out that a large part of the trip was in empty desert, and that speed limits didn't seem so important when I was the only living thing for a hundred miles. We spent some time discussing the roads he'd recommended the last time we talked before the subject of me tripping over his radar gun for the second time came up.

He shook his head, looked around, and finally said "Ya know, if I so much as punch your licence plate into my computer, it's gunna set off all kinds of alarms, your warning's gunna come up, and I won't have any choice but to give you a ticket, and because of the warning, you'll automatically get the maximum penalty." I didn't know what that meant, but it sounded just as bad as "That's a felony!" 

He leaned forward, and with a twinkle in his eye said "But if you're telling me you're on your way out of the state....."

I left town the next morning, destination: Texas.

P.S. I took hundreds of pictures in those 2 days, when I get the time to pick out some of my favorites I'll post a slideshow. (with Kim's help.)